This is the 5589th most frequent Turkish word.
olmadım
"I did not become" or "I have not been."
Here, 'olmadım' refers to 'not being' in the sense of 'not feeling a certain way' (e.g., sure).
Bu konuda her zaman emin olmadım.
I have never been sure about this subject.
In this sentence, 'olmadım' denotes 'not becoming' or 'not being in a state' of being an effective speaker.
Etkili bir konuşmacı hiç olmadım.
I have never been an effective speaker.
Here, 'olmadım' implies 'not being in a condition' to attend or feel well enough to participate.